Daniel was going to call me tonight at 9PM my time, by then I was hoping that the girls would be out, leaving the place all to myself. And because I included Daniel as the reason why, everyone thought that I was going to have phone sex with him. Let me just say that the thought has entered my mind before, I’ll admit that, but now that it was getting closer to the time of our ‘date’, as I called it, I was getting more and more nervous. The thing is, with phone sex, it could be fun or it could be a disaster. I mean, you really have to make the effort to turn someone on because it’s going to be all about sounds and descriptions; and even though I was pretty good with essays, I’m just not sure if I can master a phone sex essay.
“Just be casual about it,” Chloe said.
“Relaxed,” Janet followed.
“Just ease into it,” Jodie said lastly.
I held up my hands. “Guys, I’m not even sure if it’s going to happen. We might just talk and catch-up on things before I go visit him.”
“Dude,” Jodie said, “he’s calling you late at night.”
I shrugged. “So?”
“So he’s probably trying to get you into the mood,” Janet said.
I rolled my eyes. “He has roommates, is he going to get me in the mood while his roommates are there?”
“Okay,” Chloe said, “here’s what you do. Ask him if he’s alone. Then if he is, you’ll know that they all went out, just like us, to give you guys some smoochie-smooch alone time!”
The girls laughed and I could feel my face heat up. “What if it doesn’t all go to plan?”
“Then you’ll have another memory,” Janet said, “just one that you’ll laugh about together. And it’ll be like an inside joke.”
“Have any of you guys tried it?” I asked.
In unison, two of them said ‘no’ and only one said ‘yes’. Everyone widened their eyes at Janet. It only seemed natural to her though. The spotlight was set on Janet, and suddenly we were all very interested.
Janet shrugged. “What? Stanley is good with a lot.”
“Is Stanley your first phone sex?” Jodie asked.
Janet nodded and grinned mischievously. “It’s actually pretty fun,” she then started giggling. “See what I mean by ‘inside joke’?”
“Aren’t you guys nervous about someone keeping a tabs on your phone?” I asked worriedly.
Janet laughed. “Oh what, like some government conspiracy? Big Brother and all that jazz? Come on. I’m sure we’re not on their top ten most wanted list.”
“It’s not such a ridiculous notion, you know?” I said, hoping to get the crazy girl persona off before it manifests.
Chloe laughed. “You are way too paranoid for your own good.”
I smiled at the embarrassment but I was trying so hard to keep a straight face. “No really! One time I was having a conversation with someone and then all of a sudden the phone did some weird static sound and I started having a conversation with someone else, although I don’t think they realised because they just kept talking naturally and I just stopped to listen. It only happened a few seconds, but it happened.”
Jodie pulled down one corner of her mouth. “Freaky.”
Chloe rolled her eyes. “Freaky bullshit.”
“It’s true,” I proclaimed.
Janet smiled. “Well if it is true, then Stanley and I gave the KGB one hell of a show.”
We all laughed together, I poured myself another cup of wine, and in the flurry my phone started buzzing. Nine on the dot!
“Oooh, someone’s in a hurry to get things on,” Chloe said after she checked the time.
I rolled my eyes. “It’s not just that okay, we do miss each other, you know.”
Janet pointed at herself and winked. “I know, Anna.”
I answered the call and then asked Daniel if he could wait a second as I kissed and hugged the girls goodnight. Then I went into my room and got comfy.
“Hi Daniel!” I squealed.
Daniel chuckled. Even over the phone he sounded cool. “Hey babe. What’s happening?”
“Oh nothing, the girls are just going out for the night, they probably won’t be back until later.”
“Yeah,” he said, “my guys are gone for the night too.”
I didn’t even have to ask.
“So how are you settling in, in New York?”
Daniel sighed. “It’s been tiring. It’s so busy and energy consuming that I’m struggling to even know what my job title is. All I know is that I’m in finance.”
“Well,” I said, “at least you’re doing a good thing. You’re going to rule, you know that?”
“Oh yeah, I know,” Daniel joked.
I laughed at his cockiness.
“What about you?” he asked. “What’s new with you? Oh! How did that babysitting gig go? I feel like Eddie would have been a real pain to you.”
I rolled my eyes as I remembered each and every single person—man, woman and child—that we bumped into in Malibu was asking or assuming that Derek and I were a couple.
“It was fine,” I said, “the kids were actually well behaved and I think I got away with a lot since I carry most of the weight of the work at the agency, I feel like the other interns don’t do as much as me. Plus Eddie is a rule breaker himself; either way, I think he knew it was more of a one-off thing and that’s why I didn’t get into more deep shit.”
“Uh-huh,” he said, seemingly uninterested in the kids and much else, “what about Derek, was he well behaved?”
I smiled. “Of course, Daniel. Everything was fine. I’d let you know if it wasn’t.”
“Yeah, I know you would, I just know him and the thought of you around him is kind of annoying.”
I sighed shakily. “I know, but you could always give him a chance. He might surprise you.”
Daniel laughed. “Sure, I’ll give the asshole a chance. Where do I sign up?”
I smiled awkwardly. Was I missing something? Like, really missing something? I mean, I know they didn’t exactly start off on the right foot, but everyone makes mistakes don’t they? If everyone was reprimanded for every mistake they’ve ever done, then there’d be no such thing as moving on or letting go.
“One mistake, Daniel,” I said, “he can’t be held against it for the rest of his life, can he?”
“Sweetie, it’s so easy for anyone to call anything a mistake nowadays just so they don’t get held fully accountable on things. If I ever lose a lot of money for this company I sure as hell can’t call it a mistake.”
Hmmm, he did have a point. I think I should re-asses everything. “See, this is why I need you.”
Daniel chuckled. “You’re lost without me, huh?”
I nodded. “Indeed.”
“Why were you saying that I should give him a chance or whatever anyway?”
“Well, it’s just that, when we had dinner and we were—”
“Dinner?” There was a pause.
“Yeah, dinner,” I said. Maybe I should have eased that into the conversation a little better. “Is that okay?”
Daniel sighed. “Look, I’m not going to be one of those controlling boyfriends that get to decide who you can and cannot hang out with. But Derek? No, I’m not okay with. Still,” he sighed again, “it’s your choice.”
“I would never do anything, you know that right?”
“Babe, I know you wouldn’t, but it’s him I don’t trust. I mean, how would you feel if I suddenly hung out with Tanya?”
“That’s a different story though,” I said. “We mutually hate Tanya.”
“Shouldn’t one be enough?”
“So if you ever disliked one of my girlfriends, then you wouldn’t want me to hang out with them?”
“Now that’s a different story,” Daniel sniggered, I bet there was a wink involved. “I can dislike a girlfriend of yours, but it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t be okay with you hanging out with them.”
“Alright, I see your point.”
Daniel laughed. “I’m always right, honey, remember that.”
“Shut up,” we laughed. “Anyway, if it does make you uncomfortable then, I’ll try as I might. It just so happens that I blew him off tonight for you anyway so I’m well on my way.”
“Oh I’m touched. My girlfriend actually wants to be with me.”
“And, you smart ass,” Daniel laughed as I continued, “I’m actually looking at another advertising agency to work with.”
“Oh shit,” he said seriously, “I really am one of those controlling boyfriends.”
“No, no, no,” I said quickly. “This has nothing to do with you, babe, it’s all me.”
Daniel breathed out in relief. “I’m glad. Why then?”
I shrugged. “Well, apart from Derek, which I have my own reasons,” I said almost immediately so he couldn’t refute it, “it’s because of my boss as well, Eddie. I’m surprised he doesn’t have a sexual harassment lawsuit lodged against him.”
“Sexual harassment? What the hell did he do!?”
“No, no, no,” I said quickly again, this time I couldn’t help but to laugh a tiny bit. “God you’re so sweet. He’s a sleaze but not to me. He’s kind of an asshole. Plus, like I said, he drops most of the work on me and not much else on the rest of the interns.” I scrunched my face at the thought of what Eddie really drops on the girls.
“More of an asshole than Derek?”
“Oh, crème de la crème of assholes.”
I nodded. “I know.”
“So what’s the other agency?”
“It’s called David and Goliath. I met a creative director at a launderette, we got to talking and he gave me his card.”
“Nice sell. Wait, what’s a creative director doing at a—wait, what were you doing at a launderette?”
I laughed at his confusion. “Well, James is his name, his washer was broken. And Eddie sent me on an errand to pick up his suit.”
“Although errands are a standard for interns, picking up dry-cleaning seems to push it for me. Coffee runs I can live with, but picking up nasty underwear, I quit.”
“Thus, David and Goliath.”
In the quiet moment we had I ended up yawning, pretty widely I imagined because I literally felt my whole face stretch.
“Tired?” Daniel asked.
I shook my head, still in yawn-mode. “Nah-uh.”
Daniel snickered. “I think you are.”
“I want to spend the night with you,” I said with my eyes closed.
Daniel didn’t hold back this time and just started laughing. “You sound like a drunken pirate.”
“Jack Sparrow comes to mind.”
I huffed a little laugh. “That’s Captain Jack Sparrow to you!”
Daniel laughed again. “My mistake.”
“So what if I’m tired? We can still have some fun.”
“I know babe, but I’d rather you do it consciously. It’s bad enough if a girl passes out during sex, but during phone sex is like a whole other dimension of embarrassment.”
I giggled. “Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, I mean there’s paperwork involved. A sign that you have to carry around. Stuff like that.”
“Oh, I’ve missed you,” I said, holding my stomach as I laughed.
“Hey, I think I hear someone,” Daniel said.
“Oh?” I woke up just a bit.
“Yeah, someone must have forgotten something or whatever. Either way, we definitely can’t do anything tonight.”
“That’s too bad.”
I was hearing a lot of distant mumbling and then the sound of footsteps coming closer. I started thinking of how the sound quality of the phone was amazing since it was picking up footsteps outside of Daniel’s room. That was until…
“You know what, I think it might be Samantha. She usually realises she’s forgotten something after she leaves.”
My eyes shot wide open and my forehead crinkled. All remnants of sleep disappearing as he failed to mention that. “Samantha?”
“Yeah,” Daniel said casually, “one of my roommates.”