***Hi everyone! In case you missed it, I put up a 3rd bonus post not too long ago called ‘Ice-Creams and Bad Reputations’! I wonder if I had a twitter it’d be easier to follow along! In any case, go check it out! Hope you enjoy this post! Soul xo***
The next night, Chloe, Jodie and I were getting ready to go to the jazz bar I picked out. Janet couldn’t come because she was busy saddling up with Stanley; they seemed like a really happy couple and I was glad that the sun was shining on at least one of us.
Jodie never really liked wearing strapless dresses, and she tended to opt showing off her back, her best asset as she had once said. So tonight she was wearing a gold shimmering halter neck dress. Loose enough to be glittering in the dimly lit club but also tight enough to show off her toned body. Next was Chloe wearing a three-quarter lace sleeved number. All white and all tight! Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and the neckline was up to the base of her neck; it seemed tonight, Chloe was opting to show off her amazing legs. Unlike these girls, however, I was never brave enough to experiment with such beautiful colours, shapes and textures, so I tended to go for something simple, maybe too simple. So tonight I was wearing an LBD; it didn’t show off most of my back like Jodie’s but it did show a bit. At least my legs were definitely out tonight. Out and on the prowl. Ugh, I just had to get sucked into this didn’t I?
“Chill out Anna-banana!” Jodie said. “You’re not going to the doctor to get an injection.”
“But penetration will surely happen,” Chloe noted.
I groaned. “This is so weird. I’m not backing out or anything, but it’s just…so weird.”
“Just think of it as a new you,” Jodie explained. “Anna reincarnated.”
“Via penetration!” Chloe added.
The girls laughed and I joined with them; the only difference was that I was going bright red. When the doorbell rang it was like music to my ears. Chloe parted from her bedroom, where we were all huddled, and went to open the door.
“Maybe Janet changed her mind,” Jodie said.
I shrugged. “Maybe. I hope so, it would be fun to have Janet too. Though I’d hate to think what changed her mind.”
Then Chloe called my name and in that same instant, I knew it wasn’t Janet. My heart drummed with the same beat of Mudvayne’s Not Falling opening smash. I started getting nervous, and working myself up for the person I had been suspecting and anxious about the most. Sure enough, it was him; Adam.
Adam was wearing jeans and a plain shirt, looking like he was ready for travel. Even under the dim mercury vapour lamp lights his hair looked golden, his skin soft, his being glowing. I almost fell to his knees at the beautiful sight of him. All I had to do was rehash the entire night we spent together, and suddenly I was furious again.
“Can I talk to you?” Adam asked as Chloe left us alone.
I closed the door behind me and sat down on the steps with Adam. Parked on the curb was the cab waiting for him. His luggage must be in the back. How prestigious of Adam, to be the New Yorker travelling for his job. I was glad that he had a world of opportunities. No matter how much I was angry at Adam, he definitely deserved the best in life. It was Adam after all.
Even though I thought the best for Adam, though, I still didn’t let him know that I thought this. At least not as he sat me down on the steps of the entrance. He looked at his hands, resting in his lap, and then began fidgeting, trying to form a first sentence.
“I was hoping we could talk before I left,” Adam began. “I didn’t want to leave it the way we left it and I figured you wouldn’t take my calls. So I decided to ambush you,” Adam chuckled nervously.
“Clever plan,” I said, voice monotone.
“Look, I uh, I don’t really know what happened, with me I mean. It was all…I guess I just wasn’t myself or something.”
I huffed a little humourless laugh. “You’re passing your behaviour off as a moment that wasn’t decided by you? Uncontrollable?”
Adam shook his head. “No, no,” he said quickly, “I just…”
“You just what, Adam?” I asked after he paused.
Adam sighed and gazed at me, his blue eyes, as dark as the darkest sea, boring into mine. “I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for the way I acted. I’m sorry I upset you. I never want to upset you. The only thing I could ask of you is to understand where all that came from. I know it’s not an excuse and everything, but it’s just the way that I felt at the time. Listen to me, I sound like I’m on Oprah’s couch,” he laughed again, this time a little less shaky. “Point is, I snapped and didn’t think straight and I thought the worst of our relationship. I guess I just wanted to turn you down before you turned me down again.”
I stayed silent, wondering if the thought of rejecting him was indelibly etched into his mind. As if there was no way we’d ever get together. I wondered, if he thought this way, was there any possibility for us to happen? Had our whole relationship been decided without me knowing?
“Say something,” Adam laughed.
I cleared my throat. “Thank you. You coming here means a lot to me. I don’t want us to finish on a sour note. And,” I sighed, not wanting to admit this, “I’m sorry too, for hurting you.”
Adam chuckled and looked back down at his hands, now still in his lap. It looked like he didn’t think I needed to apologise.
“Thank you,” Adam smiled. Then he glanced out my outfit. “What’s the occasion?”
I smiled at the turn of the conversation, happy that we were almost back on track. “I’m taking the girls out to a jazz bar.”
“Sounds like fun,” Adam said.
I nodded. “I hope so.” The plan for tonight hit me hard, and suddenly it became very awkward to look at Adam straight in the eyes.
“Well,” Adam looked at the cab, stationed on the curb, and then back at me, “I better get going. Got to catch a flight back to New York.”
“Will you call me?” I asked.
Adam smiled and grazed his thumb along my cheek. “Of course I will.”
My heart started racing again, with the assumption that Adam was going to kiss me again. And I wasn’t ready for it. I wanted our entire relationship to be a friendship at this point, so I didn’t want us going back to square one starting with a kiss.
Then Adam pulled his arm in and stood. “I’ll see you later, Anna.”
I smiled, and took the hand he offered me to get up. “I’ll see you later.”
I watched Adam walk away from me, into the cab, and ride off into the darkness. If there was ever a time I’ve loved and missed Adam more at the same time, it was now; for he was the only true best guy friend I had in California. My one and only Californian soul.
Due to films, I had always pictured jazz clubs coated in a plethora of neon blue lights of various brightness. This jazz club, although neon blue lights galore, seemed to offer a different vibe than the dirty noir films provided. It was clean, hip, and the live music was heaven. What I didn’t see very often was the drummer also singing, and this drummer was. We took up a table somewhere in the middle of the room closer to the other side of the entrance. The ambience was intoxicating, and the colours mesmerising. The fumes of cigars and cigarettes, although nauseating, was an individualistic personality trait of most jazz clubs. The delicious drinks and the loving company was the cherry on top of the smoke ridden cake!
I asked the girls what they wanted for drinks and then went up to the bar. The bar, from left to right, had people sitting or standing, lined up to get drinks, eat peanuts, converse, or a combination of two or more of those. I tried getting the attention of one of the robust bartenders, but the voices of the other patrons overpowered my measly little tinker bell voice. Funnily enough, I felt as small as tinker bell too!
“Having a hard time?” asked one of the men.
The dark-skinned man had seen my pathetic struggles as legit attempts at getting the attention of the bartenders when he came over to me. His hair was cut almost close enough to a buzz cut but not quite there, and his big luscious lips opened up to reveal the most perfect set of white teeth in the world. Ladies and gentlemen, this man’s teeth is the true meaning of pearly whites; he looked like the perfect advocate for a toothpaste!
I smiled. “My friends are probably wondering if I’m making the drinks myself or something. I’ve been here waiting and they haven’t looked at me once.”
“Well that’s how they are with newbies,” he said.
I narrowed my eyes. “How do you know that I’m a newbie?”
“I actually come here often,” he explained, “I know the owner of the club, a Japanese fellow, and I’ve never seen you around.”
“Well maybe you weren’t looking hard enough.”
The man laughed. “Oh trust me, if you were here before, I would have noticed.”
I blushed and looked down to avoid his gaze. He then called the bartender, asked what I was having and then relayed my order to the bartender. When he did that, I peered over to Chloe and Jodie who were both staring intently and with high interest.
“The name’s Will,” he held out his hand.
“Anna,” I said, taking the hand offered to me.
“So what brings you here?”
“I’m having a girl’s night out,” I said, pointing at my friends.
When he looked in the direction I pointed, he waved and the girls waved back. I blushed again.
“No boys allowed?” Will asked.
I stared at his cheeky smile; his full lips was what was pulling me in most of all. I nodded and said, “By default.”
Will smiled wider, then the bartender called out his name. Will turned and then offered the bartender some cash, to which I failed to swoop in and politely decline in time. I thanked him for the gesture.
“Well I hope you have a lovely night, Anna,” Will said as he watched me take all three drinks in hand. “Maybe we’ll meet again someday.”
“Yeah.” I laughed nervously, “here’s hoping.”
When I got back to the table the girls were all over me.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Chloe asked.
“Go back to him and pounce, girl!” Jodie said.
I turned back to glimpse at Will. I hadn’t noticed before, but he had his own group of friends he was talking to. When he caught me staring at him, I quickly turned away. Making good time is clearly not my strong suit tonight.
“He is kind of cute,” I said.
“Kind of?” Chloe said. “If you pass then I’m going in for the kill.”
“Alright, Private Ryan,” I said, rolling my eyes. “How do I look?”
The girls took a moment to appraise me.
“I’d fuck you,” Jodie stated casually after a moment.
I laughed. “Thanks, tiger.”
“Now go get some,” Chloe said.
I walked back to the bar. Will hadn’t taken his eyes off me once I started walking. When he saw me finally reach the counter, he ditched whatever conversation he had going on and came back to me. The way he moved was so smooth, only a man of a certain age had that kind of movement; a kind of sway about him. I knew he was at least in his thirties, but it didn’t bother me at all.
“I knew you’d be back for more,” he said, smiling.
I rolled my eyes. “What can I say, I couldn’t get enough.”
Will laughed. “How are they enjoying the drinks?” he gestured with his chin towards my group of girls.
“They love it.”
“I’m glad, I would have asked for my money back if they didn’t,” he joked.
“You didn’t have to do that, but thank you, it was really lovely of you.”
Now to work my magic; a power the size of a ladybug. “I almost feel like I should repay you.”
Will lifted an eyebrow and the corner of his mouth hitched upwards with intrigue. “Oh?”
I nodded and bit my bottom lip. Will noticed this, and I could see his Adam’s apple ebb as he gulped.
I shrugged and twirled my hair, looking at him suggestively. “Yeah, I mean, there’s a lot of ways to say thank you, you know.” I moved closer into him, his breath rushing past me, hitting my shoulders.
Will nodded. “A lot of very good ways to say thank you.”
“I can already think of one good way,” I said.
I began distancing myself from Will, and as I took one last glance at him, started moving towards the farthest side of the room where the bathroom was. And like the trail of smoke from a cigar, Will followed after me. We disappeared into the darkest corner of the room, becoming entranced in the intoxication we had created for ourselves.