Typically a vacation spot for hard-working New Yorkers, socialites, hotel heiresses and the Kardashians, it was strange for me to be going to a funeral in the Hamptons. I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about seeing Daniel again, or meeting his father, inevitably making an appearance, but I knew I had to go regardless. I loved Jade, and I didn’t know she loved me as much Daniel said she did. It made me feel guilty that I didn’t spend enough time with her as I should have. She was a great woman; a much loved mother, a part of the reason why Daniel was an amazing guy. Richard certainly never made any more than a negative impact.
After getting a new Blackberry, and ultimately a new plan with my new life, I Facebooked Janet to ask Stanley for Daniel’s number. Stanley willingly gave the number to me, without hesitation. And by hesitation I mean without even asking Daniel for permission. Was that weird? Had that been a sign that Daniel was hoping for me to contact Stanley and ask for his number?
The event was to take place over the weekend. A sad day for Valentine’s Day goers; I assumed Daniel was too distraught to realise, or that he didn’t care. In any case, it was happening, and I was going. I had packed my bag the night before so that after work I could just duck out, but telling Adam was the hardest part. At times I didn’t even want to think about the fact that I had to tell him, or what to tell him. Eventually, that came biting me on my ass. During lunch, after work on the subway, on the short walk home, I still had no idea what to tell him. I racked my brain ferociously, convincing myself to just tell him anything, that I was going back to California, even. I thought that if I had mentioned anything to do with Daniel, I’d never hear the end of it. But he had to understand; it was for Jade, a loss in a family, a funeral and wake. He had to understand. With a new type of ease, I unlocked the door to the apartment. My hands dried after the clammy nervousness it was previously in.
When I entered I found Adam immediately. He was sitting on the couch, but shot up in a second, his knees jutting in and out in search of a more comfortable stance. Adam stared straight at me, a little crinkle forming between his brows, his eyes cold and his jaw strained. Without speaking, I stood before him and waited, not knowing what to do. It felt like I was coming home from the police station!
Adam bent down and picked up the letter, momentarily mercifully unlocking eye contact. “What the hell is this?”
The letter folded inwards limply. Unable to keep its shape from the amount of times it had been opened, folded, and crumpled.
I shrugged. “A letter.” Nice one, Anna. A genius, I was.
“A letter from Daniel,” Adam said, his voice clear and as cold as his gaze. The deep tones rippling through my body like the beat of a song in a nightclub.
“Adam, it’s about his mother.”
Adam dropped the letter onto the coffee table and crossed his arms. “So?”
I paused, blinking. “So…it’s about his mother who—”
“You’re not going.”
I held up my hands, taken aback. “Say what now?”
Adam shook his head and ran a hand through his hair. “I mean, you can’t go. He’s just playing you.”
“Adam, what the hell? He’s hurting, his mother just passed away.”
“Who gives a shit!” he yelled.
My heart started beating faster, about to escape the cage it was bounded by. My throat felt like it was on fire; a blockage was there, yes, but as if steam was rushing through, it was burning. My neck and chest turned red. “Tell me this isn’t you,” I whimpered. “You can’t be this cold.”
“What is it about this guy that keeps you running back to him, huh? What makes him so goddamn special!?”
“What the hell is wrong with you? It’s not just for him, it’s for his mother. I loved her, too.”
“Oh don’t give me that—”
“Fuck you, Adam,” I pointed. “This coming from the self-proclaimed playboy that just went off to fuck someone straight after confessing ‘feelings’ for me.”
“That was a mistake, okay, I admit it. Just don’t go.”
“You know what Adam,” I moved, gathering my belongings, “even if you think I’m making a mistake, let me make it. Let me be the judge of it; it’s my life I’m living, not yours.”
“Listen, wait, listen,” he jumped around the coffee table as I was heading for the door. I figured I could change out of my work clothes when I got there. There was no way I was going to waste any more time here. He grabbed my arm and turned me around; from the sheer force I dropped my bag on the floor. “I’m sorry, okay. Let’s just spend Valentine’s Day together. Who has a funeral on Valentine’s Day anyway?” he chuckled nervously.
“Adam,” I began to warn, “It’s starting to get really hard for me to like you let alone love you, right now, okay? So why don’t you just let me go, and spare yourself the embarrassment.”
“Fine you can go,” he said.
I narrowed my eyes. “Well thanks for the permission, I’m glad we cleared that up.”
“Just don’t kiss him, okay? Don’t even touch him.”
I pushed him back and he stumbled. “Get the fuck off of me.”
We both went for my bags. Adam got there before me, and when he rose he hit his head on my mouth. My teeth dug down on my tongue, and my mouth rattled against his head. I hit the wall hard, starting to feel a sting on both my tongue and my lips.
He dropped my bags. “Jesus, I’m so sorry. Fuck. You’re bleeding. Christ. I’m so fucking sorry, Anna. Wait, wait, I’ll get some ice. I’ll take you to the emergency room.”
He disappeared into the kitchen, and when I saw no sight of him, I made a jump for my bags and ran out. When I made it to the elevator, there was a woman inside. Adam called out for me, running towards me. “I’m sorry!” he said. But halfway, he changed his mind and slowed his run to a stop. I saw him staring at me, with a pained expression, through watery eyes. My vision of him blurred by more than tears.
The woman and I rode the elevator quietly, until she popped her gum. I turned to her, her eyes scanning my small wounds. “It ain’t none of my business, but I say leave the bastard.”
***Hi everyone! Guess what? I got my story up on Cosmopolitan.com!!! Thank you to all who have been supporting me (for both blogs and my Wattpad stories), and if you did like the stories or not, been curious enough to read all four. The story that was chosen was Black Silk and here it is on Cosmopolitan.com (got my first comment from Alessandra Torre; check out her books, they’re amazing)! If you’d like to check out the other three stories, feel free to do so, they’re still up on Wattpad! I may even use Wattpad for other stories! As always, follow me on twitter! Hope you all have\had a wonderful, sexy, Valentine’s Day; to those with or without partners in their lives, I love you, and if I could send each and every one of you a box of chocolates and Kate Spade, I would! Soul xo***