I’ve noticed now that I’ve been pushing the date back more often than not lately, and have decided to solve that by just changing the schedule. From now on, posts will be up same time the next day. It’s just more convenient for me and I’d rather not keep pushing the post back, I think it’ll help cut back on that. This is also not to say that I won’t post earlier than my scheduled time as I’ve been posting hours before with my current schedule anyway. Sorry it’s a late notice, but I wanted to see if I can keep up with this schedule but I just can’t right now, I need to push it back but it’s only a day.
This also means, there’s no post today 😦 I know. I’m sorry. But here’s a little excerpt from In Dante’s Inferno… to get you by until the next post.
All these thoughts drove me mad. Won’t let go of me. But there was more.
It was his courtesy, his sincerity, his confidence, his smile, his care, his love for his mother, his love for his brother, his passion, his drive to be the best. I had a million and one thoughts of him unboxing in my mind, spilling out details I had once missed and now cared for. The fact that he recognises little details of mine that some who have known me for years don’t even notice. This is wrong. So wrong. I can’t feel this way about him. I can’t let myself feel this way about him. We’re too different. So many things will ruin us if—if we went farther than this. This had to come to an end. We can’t be rivals and lovers.
My heart thudded as each resisting thought pounded my head. The currents sending out a shockwave to my senses.
“I like you,” he interjected.
Suddenly, I felt trapped in his embrace. I no longer felt like the key and he the lock; it felt like the other way around. To test my theory, I started shimmying my way out of his arm with success.
He sucked in a shaky breath. “Did you hear me?” He asked softly, as if he were approaching an armed woman. “I said I like you.”
“Dante, I…” I looked down, shutting my lips. I didn’t know what to say.
“Wait, slow down,” he said, grabbing my arm and pulling me closer into him. “Will you just wait?” He chuckled in disbelief.
He started backing me up against a brick wall building. A grate in the middle of the street strung grey smoke up into the air, dissipating as quickly as my feelings for Dante grew in my throat, blocking my voice. Dante inched closer, leaning forward, his head low, his warm breath smelling vacantly of alcohol. We didn’t drink much, we didn’t even ask for seconds, so neither of us were as drunk as to make clouded judgements.
Dante, with his soft, brown hair even shinier in the darkness. How the hell is that even possible?
Dante, with his smooth, velvety skin, with enough lines to lift the corner of his mouth into a smile of comfort. In an effort to comfort me?
Dante, with one hand beside my head, holding himself up on the wall, the other on my waist, not completely around. Out of hesitance?
Dante, with his parted lips; I couldn’t help but stare at the slight hint of a tongue hiding between his immaculately white teeth. Pearly cage, as it were.
Oh, Dante, what are you doing to me? I clutched my heart and tried looking away.
“Hold on,” he said, bringing his forefinger, cool as the night, to the side of my jaw, gently turning my head back to face him. “What’s going on? One point we’re prancing along fine, the next, you’re acting strange? I told you I like you, Elise.” He cleared his throat, brushing my lips with his thumb. “A lot, Elise. I like you a lot.” He gulped and I saw his Adam’s apple roll. I could practically feel the imprint of his thumb. The lines of his identity, strewn on like ripples.
“What do you want me to say?” I asked, swallowing air as if I was suffocating. My heart won’t stop racing and I fear it’ll be the death of me.
“I want you to tell me how you feel?” I fell silent. Dante shrugged, completely unfazed by my lack of replies. “Do you like me?”
I closed my eyes and slightly nodded. It was the only way I could admit it without feeling like I did admit it. It’s just all too much for me right now. I mean, with our positions within our respective companies, and—
Suddenly, cold lips were on mine. Melting my mouth open, his tongue pillaging its way onto mine; we touched lightly. Most of all, the kiss seemed to taste of certainty from him, as I was uncertain. Warily aware of our situation. He’s living in a fantasy world. A world where none of this can happen. I thought we were just having fun. I thought we were having fun. But this is more than fun. This is something more than just sex—something amazing, no less, don’t get me wrong—but it was scaring the shit out of me.
“Stop, stop, stop,” I breathed urgently as he diverted his generous attention to my neck.
“Why?” he whispered. I could feel him getting hard. Oh, what I would do…
“We can’t do this.”
“Why not. Elise, give me one good reason why?”
“You don’t think this is strange? How we’ve come to be?”
Dante grinned blissfully. “I think it’s fantastic.”
“Dante,” I said, placing my hand on his chest as he was about to lean in again. “We can’t. There’s too much at stake.”
“Yes. Look, this is what’s going to happen. You and are going to get together, we’re going to start off really great and have the time of our lives. Then, somewhere down the track, we’re going to get more competitive, not trust each other, hold secrets and refuse to even hold a conversation. We’re going to be stuck in a rut of our own making because we work for different companies in the same business and we’re just going to keep going at each other for not being on each other’s side.” I swallowed a huge heap of emotions. “We’ll resent each other. We’re either going to break up or—” I didn’t want to say it, even after I told him what happened with Dean “—and we would have wasted many years of our lives working at something that was a lost cause from the beginning.”
Dante nodded, pushing off the wall and standing on his own two feet, taking me in. Almost immediately after there came a rush of cold air between us. My once warm cheeks, that perhaps were pink, now feel numb.
Dante kept nodding. “You’re certain this would happen?”
I shrugged. “It’s only matter of time.” My voice nearly collapsing in on itself as I tried sounding as certain as possible.
He gazed at my lips and returned his eyes onto mine. “I really like kissing you.”
I cleared my throat, coming off from leaning on the wall with my back. “I really like kissing you, too.” Damn, I shouldn’t have said that. My freakin’ bottom lip even started trembling. Like, really? I do not want to cry in front of Dante.
He would probably comfort me in his arms right after I just turned him down. Be the ever sweet guy that no one saw coming. Unfortunately, this story doesn’t have a happy ending. Dante understanding this surprised me. I thought he would put up a much greater fight. But, since I’m the one turning him down, why would he? He either sees the value in my words, or he believes the fight will be pointless. And a fight for what? A non-existent relationship? Dante has a plethora of girls to choose from, least of all me. He can get any girl he wants at the drop of a hat; he doesn’t need me. The next girl he sees, he’ll jump right at her, I’m sure of it. He’ll forget me, or he can forget me; soon enough, it’ll happen. We’ll return to our busy, bustling lives as if we hadn’t met each other. We’ll bump into each other at awards parties and whatnot, exchange pleasantries and enjoy minimal conversation, and then we’ll part ways again. No longer the moths to a flame; no longer in need but obligated. It’ll be easy, it’ll be simple; quick and light. No hard times.
“You don’t have to escort me home,” I said as were both teetered off back on the sidewalk in the direction of my place. “I can find a cab.”
“I’ll get a cab for the both of us and just ride with you.”
“Dante—” I was about to protest.
“Look, at least allow me the peace of mind of knowing that you’re safe. At least give me that.”
I heard a little aggressiveness colouring his tone. Was he mad all of a sudden? By my account? I was only being honest, why am I being punished for it?
“Dante,” I said, following him to the curb as he hailed down a cab. “I’m only being realistic.”
Dante chuckled humourlessly, shaking his head. “Listen to yourself. Realistic? You’re so focused on the logic of us. Where’s your heart in it, Elise? Where is it? Because that’s the only voice I’m interested in hearing.”
Hope you liked that! 😉 Thanks to all who buy\have bought the book and reviewed it. I appreciate it!
Also, Amy W and mum., I see your comments and questions from the previous two posts and hopefully I’ll be able to answer your questions in the next post. See you all then! 🙂
Soul xo ❤