Limp

Dear Anna,

How are you? I miss you. Next week I’m doing some business in L.A. and was wondering if you wanted to meet up? It’s been too long. We should get together. Did I mention I miss you?

Daniel.

Forward to: Janet; Chloe; Jodie.

SEND.

***

“Okay,” I rushed into Lucy’s salon, waving my arms in the air, “I have to tell you something and you really have to refrain from judgement and—” I looked up and saw her holding up foils on an old lady’s grey hair.

“Deary, my hair?” the old lady said to Lucy.

Lucy shook her head and snapped back into it after giving me a ‘the fuck?’ look. “Oh, sorry Margaret.”

“Yeah, sorry,” I said.

“Oh don’t apologise, deary,” the old lady said to me, “it’s clear you have some issues needing to be addressed. You may make your case—” she looked at Lucy’s reflecting in the mirror— “gossip is exciting, haven’t heard anything new in a long time.”

“Oh, I’ll just wait,” I said.

“Back room,” Lucy gestured with her head.

“Oh, damn,” the old lady said. I didn’t want to disappoint her but I didn’t want to give her a heart attack either. Even I’m shocked with myself.

“Sorry I took a while,” Lucy said, splitting the curtain of beads and coming into the back room. “What’s up?”

“So, umm, I sort of kissed Jasper.”

Lucy grinned and lifted a brow. “Did you now?” I nodded. “Well isn’t this exciting. You and Jasper and oh…his girlfriend.”

“Yeah, it’s bad, I know, it’s bad right?”

Lucy lifted an index finger. “Let me call in some reinforcements.”

“What?”

“Viv and Katya should hear this,” she pulled out her phone.

I groaned. “Katya’s going to love this.”

“She will actually,” Lucy chuckled.

“She’ll be too biased.”

“Biased? Relax you’re not on trial.”

“Feels that way in my head,” I mumbled.

I was chewing on the ridge between my nail and my skin waiting for Vivian and Katya while Lucy finished up her client in the salon. From what seemed like a hundred years later, Lucy was on her lunch break and we decided to meet up with Vivian and Katya at the diner. Surrounded by food may not be a great place to be if you need to stress eat, on the other hand, Buzz’s food is tasty as hell. I ordered chocolate chip pancakes galore.

“I knew it as soon as you called,” Katya said. “Look—” she held up her forearm— “goosebumps.”

“Knew what?” Vivian asked.

“It’s nothing major,” I shook my head and then nudged Lucy’s elbow. “What did you say to them?”

“She said nothing,” Vivian said, cutting Lucy off before she could speak.

“She literally was like ‘you have to come now, quick, Anna’s got something to tell us!’” Katya nodded.

Vivian nodded in sync with Katya. “With a little more urgency.”

Katya gasped and stood up, her chair dragged on the floor and echoed through the diner. “’You have to come now! QUICK! Anna’s got something to tell us!’”

“Shhh sit down!” I implored. We all laughed and I was glad Jasper was nowhere to be found. I didn’t want him to think I was rushing out and telling the next person I knew about what happened.

“Alright, so spill,” Vivian told me.

I sighed, reluctant to say anything. “I kissed Jasper.”

Katya burst out laughing. “Shit yeah!”

“That’s good?” I asked. Is that the reaction I want? Or need?

“Hell yeah!” she reassured.

I turned to Vivian. She shrugged. “It’s not bad.”

“But I’m cheating,” I said.

“No, no,” Lucy shook her head. “He’s cheating. You owe nothing to Julie.”

“Worse,” I scoffed, “I’m an accomplice.”

“How is that worse?” Vivian narrowed her eyes in thought.

“Dude, this is great,” Katya said, grinning from ear to ear. “You get to have so much fun, and Julie’s a bitch anyway.”

“Does that justify this?” I asked.

“It’s Jasper that’s supposed to be loyal to Julie,” Vivian said. “Not you. So long as you’re into it, I don’t see a problem.”

“Why does it feel bad then?” I asked.

“Because it is bad,” Lucy snickered, making us giggle like teenage girls.

“But oh so good?” I asked, smiling.

“Exactly.”

“Well,” I breathed, feeling a little relaxed, “what am I supposed to do now?”

“What do you mean?” Lucy asked.

“I haven’t spoken to him since,” I said.

“You should,” Katya said.

“And say what?”

“You should set the parameters of the relationship,” Vivian said.

“Relationship,” I muttered, scrunching my nose as if the stench of the word was rotten and lifted.

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Not relationship but—” she wiggled her brows— “relationship.”

The diner doorbell ringed and Jasper entered seeking his typical coffee dosage. He called out Buzz’s name and just like that, Buzz was at work making a cup. He caught sight of me and the girls and smiled. I smiled back, feeling giddy. He’s so hot. So gorgeous. I couldn’t breathe, but I maintained my smile. I stretched my arms out over the table. It felt like Buzz was taking a century to make his cup. He took it when it was done, flashed a lasting smile, and then left.

“Ugh,” I sunk onto the table.

The girls woo’ed and started poking me and I heated up with embarrassment.

“You should totally talk to him,” Lucy ended.

I was out for the rest of the day and texted him late into the night. Instantaneously he texted me back.

I’ll be right over.’

No, no, no, you don’t have to,’ I texted back. He never answered.

I stayed up watching a bit for a few minutes, dreading the wait. My knee kept shuddering up and down and I chewed on my lips, reaching for the carmex to calm my lip biting frenzy.

The knock on the door jolted me up. My heart racing. I breathed in and opened the door. “Hi.”

He looked up, smiling. “Hey.”

“Come in.”

I turned around and took a few steps back, crossing my arms over my chest. “Umm…” I chuckled, standing awkwardly at the entryway. “Want some—I have some wine, water, did you want…?”

“Yeah, water is fine,” he smiled.

“Cool, cool,” I said, backing away first and into the edge of a wall.

Jasper laughed. “Are you okay?”

“Mm-hmm, yup.” I was dying on the inside.

Jasper stood leaning against the wall of my kitchen walkway as I grabbed a clear glass from the cupboard. I filled up the water, breathing fast and my hands shaking. I turned down the rush of the water to a slower drip because I wanted time to think of something to say. But it was too long.

Jasper clutched my hands from behind and drenched them in the water, my hand turning white as I gripped his hand tightly. He pushed aside my hair with his other hand and pecked kisses slowly down my neck. Each kiss tingled and my body shuddered.

“Jasper,” I breathed.

“Mmm?” I felt him hard.

“I thought we should talk.”

“So talk.” Oh, the warm air from his lips.

I couldn’t even form a straight sentence. I muttered a lot, forgetting what I needed to say. Even if I should’ve said anything. I guess I should’ve expected this. I didn’t, however, expect his wet hand creeping down my shorts. I sighed, grabbing his side to steady myself and resting my head back onto his shoulder….

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11 thoughts on “Limp

  1. Yaye! Another post!!! I have always been team Daniel but right now I’m loving this Jasper connection!! Great writing as always Soul!!

  2. I’m getting a bit over the Daniel story line.. I feel like it’s dragged on too long now.
    Still absolutely love your writing though.
    Can’t wait for the next update, I check back most days to see if there’s a new one.

    1. 15098298204% agree Daniel should be left in the distant past, where he belongs!! It’s just too much and I don’t think anything could save their platonic OR romantic relationship… just cut ties permanently, plsssss.. lol

      Hope we get a new post soon!! 🙂

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